They say adoption isn't for the weak of heart - I totally agree. During this entire process I have experienced so many ups and downs...times when I thought news of our daughter was just around the corner (to find out no news yet) -- and times of great joy getting to see a picture of her lovely face for the first time. It has been a rollercoaster of many emotions, multiple countries, over a period of many, many years.
When I think about our pregnancy with Joshua, I recall the same emotional ups and downs... at one point thinking surely something would happen to the pregnancy, to news he might be born with Downs syndrome, to the joy of hearing his delayed cry at birth, and to find he was born "normal", healthy, with big bright eyes that would look into my soul. (Not to mention the morning sickness that for me lasted all day long.... the heat in the summer months being huge with a belly... and the fatigue ... honestly, I didn't enjoy being pregnant). I recall during all those ups and downs... our Lord being right by my side, giving me peace. After all, he knows me sooo well... and knows He designed me with great passion and strong emotions (I think I mentioned I cry very easy :) so he knows I need an extra dose of peace often! I say that out of the utmost respect for any woman unable to have children and with no intent of hurting them or anything like that (which I do have a few of those ladies in my life). I just mean, with all honesty... there are such similarities going through the adoption process to being pregnant... only if you have experienced both can you really understand. I know, I've seen blogs where some hate it when women make this comparison... but I pray all open their heart to my sincere love and appreciation for their pain, and even perhaps give the experience of adoption a try.
Praying for Lauren and several other PAPs and orphans in India also brings me great sadness and longing for these children to be united with families...but it also brings me great joy. Today was one of those days….of great joy. During my prayer time, I received such a sense of peace from God that He's in total control and has it ALL figured out. After my prayer time, Shawn McDonald’s song “Rise” came on. For those who don’t know this song, I encourage you to click on youtube and give it a listen or read the lyrics below….the up beat song is well worth the listen. It is so empowering! I absolutely LOVE it. For me, it’s about submission of self and letting Christ who is in me be the driver of my life. When I truly do that…. I find peace. I know He is working on these adoptions to bring children home, I know we are changed forever for the process and the friendships we build along the way, and I know I am ever thankful for him knowing and loving me this much!
Yes I will rise
Out of these ashes rise
From this trouble I have found
And this rubble on the ground
I will rise
Yes I will rise
Out of these ashes rise
From this trouble I have found
And this rubble on the ground
I will rise
Cause He Who is in me
Is greater than I will ever be
And I will rise
Sometimes my heart is on the ground
And hope is nowhere to be found
Love is a figment I once knew
And yet I hold on to what I know is true
Yes I will rise
Out of these ashes rise
From this trouble I have found
And this rubble on the ground
I will rise
Cause He Who is in me
Is greater than I will ever be
And I will rise
Well I keep on coming to this place
That I don't know quite how to face
So I lay down my life in hopes to die
That somehow I might rise
Yes I will rise
Out of these ashes rise
From this trouble I have found
And this rubble on the ground
I will rise
Cause He Who is in me
Is greater than I will ever be
And I will rise
Artist: Shawn McDonald
This blog documents our adoption journey (our daughter is from India). Now that she's home with us and we are a complete family of four (we also have a son, Joshua) this blog serves to share a variety of topics, adoption related, parenting..... just everyday life. Check out our FAQ on adoption questions, along with any other questions commonly asked.
Thank you for this, Renae. Just what I needed today.
ReplyDeleteSarah - consider this a long distance hug :) It's going to be ok, I promise... He will provide all things for his plans. ~Renae.
ReplyDeleteAmen! So well put, Renae. :) It truly is an up and down experience, yet at the same time there is such peace in knowing God is so trustworthy!!!!
ReplyDeleteHello! I found your blog through another blogging mama. We are waiting for another daughter from India, and boy is it taking a looonng time. Our first came home in Dec. 2007. It's great to find another family adopting from India -- there aren't that many of us! Godspeed on your journey to Lauren,
ReplyDeleteNancy
Love your blog -- beautiful family :) It's getting late tonight - so I'll have to poke around a bit more on your blog later :)
DeleteRenae
Please sign our petition:
ReplyDeletehttp://www.ipetitions.com/petition/for-the-adoption-authority-of-ireland-to-send?utm_medium=email&utm_source=system&utm_campaign=Send%2Bto%2BFriend
Prospective Adoptive Parents from Ireland holding a Declaration of eligibility and suitability to adopt from India for years and being aged out by red tape