Thursday, April 7, 2011

Working on our Service Plan - Praying for Chiffon Curtains.

We have a significant project called a Service Plan.  It is lengthy with all kinds of things to read, research, and write strategies, etc. for adding our daughter into our daily life.  I'm currently reading Inside Transracial Adoption - one of the required books. .... and ran across a quote in the book that is so very much worth repeating... I love it so much.

Quoted from Inside Transracial Adoption by Steinberg and Hall. 
"Relationships are made of one at a time, in tiny links, experiences joined together end to end to make a chain… trying to become part of something we don’t know much about may at first feel like pushing against a heavy wooden door, but, after time when you begin to connect to people one by one, the door becomes lighter and lighter, until eventually it is like pushing aside a soft chiffon curtain." 

I immediately think of some of our friends, our friends from the Congo, our friends in our Sunday School class at church, our neighbors.... these are all relationships we love very much...but I do remember at times feeling very awkward with them, not knowing what to say... how to relate... and with our Congo friends trying to converse even though their English is limited..... wow, we've come so far in this last year with friendships.... we're around people we love and that love us.... we are free to be ourselves, and are validated by our friends for who we are.  We share things in honesty, in caring for each other, and in brotherly love.

So I'm learning that this is exactly how our little girl will feel from India.  She will work hard at being accepted by her family, she will be out of sorts in a new environment, she doesn't know what a car seat will be like (this is something our agency mentioned), our foods will be different than what she's used to, we will look different, she will be exposed to many new sights and sounds, AND she will experience a 20+ hour airplane ride - that even to this day I'm amazed with.  We will be going through changes too....but our changes will all be in the comfort and surrounding love and arms of our environment and our friends (you chiffon curtains out there)...... SHE will on the other hand have nothing of comfort but perhaps a toy or familiar piece of clothing from India {home}.  Is is possible to love her soooo much that she won't feel the pain or discomfort?  Is it possible that she's too young to notice these differences.... I think not, we know 2 year olds, just because they may not speak in full coherent sentences doesn't mean they are not taking it all in.  We vow to do all we can to make her feel accepted and at belong with us... but I know this will take some Divine Intervention to fill some of the holes in her heart for the losses she will experience.  I pray with certainty that all of you, our friends and family, will work hard to bring our little one into the chiffon curtain relationships that we share.  She will need all our love....


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