Ok, so now true confessions here..... I have reached the desparate cry out to God for word we can pick up our little Lauren Anjali. I am so tired of this long wait.... I've clearly reached the whine mode. And I know, I know... I'm the one that says with most all things.... "trust in God, His timing is perfect..... He has a plan". And even today our sermon at church was about "personal responsibility" and our true purpose in life is two fold: 1.) A deep relationship with Jesus and 2.) To become more like Jesus -- to build our character. So with all this truth and teaching... I have to confess..... I just want my girl! Doesn't He know that Joshua starts school soon....doesn't he know our summer is almost over???? I want Joshua to be able to spend a few weeks with her before school starts.....and I'm tired of the waiting. (I know, that's a lot of "I's" -- but it's the truth!) ... And I'm not even sure I'm sold out on the idea of "building my character!!"...... there, I said it. I need divine peace in my life, because right now.... I am OUT of SORTS! I am feeling so sorry for myself, and I'm eating like crazy!! There is nothing else to do to get prepared for....we have a baby gate.... our paperwork is in order .... we are partially packed..... enough already.
but.......... I know in my heart of hearts He is in control...and there's a reason for this wait...and He does know what's good for me (and all of us)..... I also know that I don't have to like it, right? Right now, I don't like it .... remind me friends... these days are a grain of sand on the full beach of life. Give me hope...speak God's truth...I'm needing some intense prayer to calm this craziness. I just can't wait to be "on the other side of this" so I can look back with thanksgiving for His perfect plan .... I'm trying to trust....but it's hard!
(according to Joshua's nighttime prayer last night -- he wants to know something in "8, 9, or 10 days", he said, "it won't be tomorrow.... but 8, 9, or 10 days would be good" Lord Jesus hear his prayer.)
This blog documents our adoption journey (our daughter is from India). Now that she's home with us and we are a complete family of four (we also have a son, Joshua) this blog serves to share a variety of topics, adoption related, parenting..... just everyday life. Check out our FAQ on adoption questions, along with any other questions commonly asked.
Renae, I was just thinking. wow,it is July they have to hear something SOON! I bet Joshua's timeline is correct. Amazing you are just one step away from holding your beautiful daughter.
ReplyDeleteOh Renae...I was thinking of you today too...thinking you have been WAITING A LONG TIME!!! Praying for your sweet spirit... Lord, please bring Lauren home very soon!
ReplyDeleteOh Renae, I am so sorry for this wait. My perspective is that though this is our Father's imperfect will (His will in this imperfect world), it is not His perfect will, because God does not desire for sweet Lauren to be one second longer without a family to love her! In heaven there are no orphans and Jesus told us to pray for His Father's will to be done on earth as it is in heaven. I will continue to pray that Lauren will be an orphan no longer and that you will be able to get her SOON!!!
ReplyDeleteThank you for so faithfully pursuing all that He has for you during this season. You show us a beautiful example of faith and love for our wonderful Father.
Hugs to you Renae! I remember the end of our wait and how hard it is not knowing exactly when you'll leave. It's been a long journey to Lauren and we are praying like crazy that your wait is almost over my friend! I just can't wait to see her in your arms!!! SOON!!!
ReplyDeleteOh, Renae...it is HARD. I was just telling someone the other day, "What is up with Renae's long wait....this is getting CRAZY." So, you see, it's not just you who is thinking this is getting ridiculous!!!!
ReplyDeleteI am praying you hear something soon, soon, soon. Amen to Joshua's prayer.
They said the longest part of waiting was over, right? Your done with the investigative phase....And mid July would mean 8 or 9 more days....
Love you..... :)
Ugh! Renae I am praying for you!! I also believe that you are in the trenches of an intense spiritual battle because you are SO CLOSE to bringing her home and satan HATES that! I am praying that Jesus will tear down, destroy, obliterate, demolish and crush the strongholds of every evil thing raised up against Lauren's adoption and you getting to her as soon as possible. There are so many people praying for you- I hope that you can find comfort :) WE ARE WITH YOU!!!
ReplyDeleteYou all are an amazing set of ladies -- and prayer warriors. I appreciate you all so very much. It's great being yourself and knowing that folks won't think you've gone off the deep end... being loved as is... that's Christ-like gals :) Thanks so much for the prayers and support. I need this truth spoken to me right now -that empowers me to cast Satan aside, I agree this feels like a battle, for sure. One thing I didn't think of ... during Joshua's prayer - we end in the Lord's prayer -- so now I will focus on Father's will done here on earth as it is in heaven.... thank you so much - I can't even express how much all of you and your encouragement means to me XOXO - Renae.
ReplyDeleteI have had you in my thoughts these past couple weeks... I know it will be SOON. The all-out whine point means that it is almost time. Hang in there :)
ReplyDeletePraying for you! Thank you for sharing your heart--a lot of us are in the same boat...believing in God's perfect timing, but wishing it would move a little faster. Lots of love!
ReplyDeletePraying for you and each of these precious children! As Cindy footes song says "Bring our Children HOME Lord!!!"
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